I have been so challenged this week in my faith that I can't begin to express all that I've felt. It seems that as I draw close to returning home to see my family and friends in the U.S. I seem to get more stressed out. I've never felt more clearly the call to Uganda as I have in the past day. I've realized now that much of this stress is a result of how I feel in leaving all the people here who love me so dearly in every way: kids who consider me a father to them, students whom I am mentoring to understand the fullness of their calling in Christ, friends that will be remaining here for the holidays away from their own families in the U.S. and much more.
I think somewhere in the process of knowing that I was going home for an unplanned visit, my faith began to struggle. I was especially challenged the other day when I announced to the students at the high school that it would be my last chapel day there. I explained to them that my dad was sick and that I was needed at home to care for him. Many came afterward and expressed their love for me and their belief that God would heal him. I laughed as many of them said that and at one point even expressed that I didn't feel that God was going to heal him. But after pondering those thoughts that night, I wondered...did I not want God to heal him?...did I not have enough faith in God that He could heal my father? There was a major problem in my head. I had come to the realization that maybe I lacked faith in the power of God. There's a big difference between knowing in your head the power of God to do the miraculous and the belief that He can and will do the miraculous in this world. It's not like I haven't seen people healed of injuries and diseases, but I guess I had been skeptical of the reality of God's power to heal.
At that moment, I had to rebuke those thoughts in my head and choose to believe that God can heal my father of his illness if it is in His will. Before I had already decided it was God's will for him not to be healed, but that was my human judgment maybe even a result of the lack of a solid relationship with my earthly father. Instead now, I choose to increase my faith in God's power and His will for my father first to save him from his sin and secondly to heal the problems with his earthly body.
Mark 9:20-24
So they brought him. When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the boy into a convulsion. he fell to the ground and rolled around foaming at the mouth.
Jesus asked the boy's father, "How long has he been like this?"
"From childhood," he answered. "It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pit on us and help us."
"'If you can'?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes."
Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"
I feel like the father in this passage. I deeply want healing both physical and spiritual for my father, but I'm the one to use that word..."IF" "If it is possible God, heal my father" has been my prayer. Instead, I have to claim what Jesus says that "everything is possible for him who believes". So I write today believing that God can and will heal my father if it is in His will. I now believe it, but ask Jesus to help me with my unbelief!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Sudan the minstry
So you've probably already read all about our adventures in Sudan. So let's talk ministry. Sudan is a lot different than Uganda. The weather is much hotter there as we experienced every day. We were in Southern Sudan which has been sparsely populated over the past 20+ years due to the war there. People are finally returning to their villages...many after years in displacement camps in Uganda. So there's lots of land, but not a lot of development. In the place where we ministered, the soil was very fertile so the people could at least grow crops to sustain themselves.
Magwi is close to the Ugandan border. The people in that county were mostly from the Acholi tribe. Yes, if you know Uganda, there are also Acholis in Uganda. Therefore there are many similarities between northern Uganda and Sudan. Acholis are pretty much a male dominated society. It was something that we experienced on our first day of the conference. Other conferences that I've ministered at in Uganda were packed with people, both men and women just waiting to be fed. In Sudan...men. The few women around were outside cooking for us the whole day. It was a big shock to me. Secondly, I thought we would be ministering to many, but there were only 20 church leaders/pastors there. Made me a little sad.
However, the men there were very responsive to the messages we gave. Pastor Dongo spoke on being a pastor. Pastor Richard spoke on team ministry. And I spoke about what our lives should look like as believers and leaders in our communities. The men were very challenged as we spoke. Some regarding the roles of their wives and how they should minister to them. Others saw how important it was to build teams within their churches so they as leaders didn't have to do anything.
As for me, I sometimes feel inadequate in such situations of speaking/sharing with people. The set of talks that I gave I have given before, but in all reality I really didn't want to be in Sudan. It was way out of my comfort zone. I became accustomed to my life in Uganda. I was in Sudan with no electricity apart from lights from 7pm to 11pm every night. Totally dependent on the time schedule of someone else. My introverted self was screaming out because I had very little alone time. But in such situations is when the Lord really uses me. I really felt the power of the Holy Spirit through times of sharing with the people there. Before leaving for Sudan, I had two talks prepared, but knew that I had to do three. I had some ideas of what to share, but really didn't see where the Spirit was taking me until the night before the last day. Although that talk was very disorganized because of lack of preparation, there seemed to be power behind the message. I was later encouraged by one of the pastors that he was really challenged to think out of the box regarding the types of ministry they focused on there.
The most interesting thing was that as we planned the trip, we never had an intention of focusing everything on one theme. We had never really discussed the breakdown of the talks, but as the days went by, I found that the Lord had really generated a theme to share with the people there. Most of our talks overlapped in subject matter. Many of our main points were in line together. I was just blessed to watch the Holy Spirit work.
So though I can't rate this trip as my favorite ever, I know that there was purpose behind it. I believe the people were blessed and challenged in their ministry. And of course in many ways we were blessed and challenged as well.
Magwi is close to the Ugandan border. The people in that county were mostly from the Acholi tribe. Yes, if you know Uganda, there are also Acholis in Uganda. Therefore there are many similarities between northern Uganda and Sudan. Acholis are pretty much a male dominated society. It was something that we experienced on our first day of the conference. Other conferences that I've ministered at in Uganda were packed with people, both men and women just waiting to be fed. In Sudan...men. The few women around were outside cooking for us the whole day. It was a big shock to me. Secondly, I thought we would be ministering to many, but there were only 20 church leaders/pastors there. Made me a little sad.
However, the men there were very responsive to the messages we gave. Pastor Dongo spoke on being a pastor. Pastor Richard spoke on team ministry. And I spoke about what our lives should look like as believers and leaders in our communities. The men were very challenged as we spoke. Some regarding the roles of their wives and how they should minister to them. Others saw how important it was to build teams within their churches so they as leaders didn't have to do anything.
As for me, I sometimes feel inadequate in such situations of speaking/sharing with people. The set of talks that I gave I have given before, but in all reality I really didn't want to be in Sudan. It was way out of my comfort zone. I became accustomed to my life in Uganda. I was in Sudan with no electricity apart from lights from 7pm to 11pm every night. Totally dependent on the time schedule of someone else. My introverted self was screaming out because I had very little alone time. But in such situations is when the Lord really uses me. I really felt the power of the Holy Spirit through times of sharing with the people there. Before leaving for Sudan, I had two talks prepared, but knew that I had to do three. I had some ideas of what to share, but really didn't see where the Spirit was taking me until the night before the last day. Although that talk was very disorganized because of lack of preparation, there seemed to be power behind the message. I was later encouraged by one of the pastors that he was really challenged to think out of the box regarding the types of ministry they focused on there.
The most interesting thing was that as we planned the trip, we never had an intention of focusing everything on one theme. We had never really discussed the breakdown of the talks, but as the days went by, I found that the Lord had really generated a theme to share with the people there. Most of our talks overlapped in subject matter. Many of our main points were in line together. I was just blessed to watch the Holy Spirit work.
So though I can't rate this trip as my favorite ever, I know that there was purpose behind it. I believe the people were blessed and challenged in their ministry. And of course in many ways we were blessed and challenged as well.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Sudan the adventures
So this past week, I was in Sudan to help Pastor Dongo as he went there to minister to some pastors and church leaders. I wasn't too excited about the trip considering that I am soon going home and have lots of work to accomplish here in Uganda before returning home for a somewhat long visit.
We left very early Monday morning and experienced just the beginning of some transportation challenges for the week. We were flying on a fairly small airplane from Africa Inland Mission that day. As we went for take off, the pilot decided to not take off. He didn't say anything to us at first, just taxied back to the terminal. Later, he told us that there was a problem with the wind speed indicator. After about an hour and a half of phone calls and working to fix the problem, he said it was fixed. We went for takeoff and had no problems the rest of the way. At this point, I had been informed on very little about our trip to Sudan. I learned that we were landing at a place called Torit. It is in the Eastern Equatoria state of Sudan which borders Northern Uganda. We landed safely on a somewhat sketchy dirt runway with some strategically placed potholes.
The next step was to get to Magwi from Torit. The drive was supposed to be about 2 hours. Not too far right? I think the distance was something like 36 km. Do you get the picture? We were lucky to have a Land Cruiser to manage the potholes and large puddles (what else can you call those things...not potholes, but small ponds?) A little more than halfway, the driver tried to make a maneuver around one of these pools only to find the mud give way and he slipped back into the pool. However, we managed not to get stuck there. A short while after, we came upon a convoy of UN vehicles as one had gotten stuck in one of those pools. We waited and watched for about 30 minutes as they tried unsuccessfully to pull the vehicle out. Finally, they let us pass their convoy, but about 10 minutes later, our car also broke down (not in a pool though). We sat and waited as the driver attempted to fix it and call for help. The pastor who was hosting us ended up walking to the next village and catching a boda boda to Magwi where he found some mechanics who arrived about an hour later with 3 bodas to take us to town. So the rest of our trip was on boda to town without our luggage as we waited for the car to make it the rest of the way.
A few days later, we got a different car to take us to a few towns in the area to visit their health care facilities. The car was a sketchy Rav4 with the tires almost completely bald in some cases. We noticed that the driver kept watching one tire specifically. Lo and behold on the way back, we got a flat tire. As if that wasn't enough, it almost immediately began to rain like cats and dogs.
Finally, today, we returned on the smallest plane possible I think. It was not a smooth ride...let's just say I'm glad my stomach wasn't full at the beginning or else it would have been trouble. So needless to say, we had a few interesting transportation adventures in our short week in Sudan. Oh yeah...we did ministry also...I'll write separately about that later.
We left very early Monday morning and experienced just the beginning of some transportation challenges for the week. We were flying on a fairly small airplane from Africa Inland Mission that day. As we went for take off, the pilot decided to not take off. He didn't say anything to us at first, just taxied back to the terminal. Later, he told us that there was a problem with the wind speed indicator. After about an hour and a half of phone calls and working to fix the problem, he said it was fixed. We went for takeoff and had no problems the rest of the way. At this point, I had been informed on very little about our trip to Sudan. I learned that we were landing at a place called Torit. It is in the Eastern Equatoria state of Sudan which borders Northern Uganda. We landed safely on a somewhat sketchy dirt runway with some strategically placed potholes.
The next step was to get to Magwi from Torit. The drive was supposed to be about 2 hours. Not too far right? I think the distance was something like 36 km. Do you get the picture? We were lucky to have a Land Cruiser to manage the potholes and large puddles (what else can you call those things...not potholes, but small ponds?) A little more than halfway, the driver tried to make a maneuver around one of these pools only to find the mud give way and he slipped back into the pool. However, we managed not to get stuck there. A short while after, we came upon a convoy of UN vehicles as one had gotten stuck in one of those pools. We waited and watched for about 30 minutes as they tried unsuccessfully to pull the vehicle out. Finally, they let us pass their convoy, but about 10 minutes later, our car also broke down (not in a pool though). We sat and waited as the driver attempted to fix it and call for help. The pastor who was hosting us ended up walking to the next village and catching a boda boda to Magwi where he found some mechanics who arrived about an hour later with 3 bodas to take us to town. So the rest of our trip was on boda to town without our luggage as we waited for the car to make it the rest of the way.
A few days later, we got a different car to take us to a few towns in the area to visit their health care facilities. The car was a sketchy Rav4 with the tires almost completely bald in some cases. We noticed that the driver kept watching one tire specifically. Lo and behold on the way back, we got a flat tire. As if that wasn't enough, it almost immediately began to rain like cats and dogs.
Finally, today, we returned on the smallest plane possible I think. It was not a smooth ride...let's just say I'm glad my stomach wasn't full at the beginning or else it would have been trouble. So needless to say, we had a few interesting transportation adventures in our short week in Sudan. Oh yeah...we did ministry also...I'll write separately about that later.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Cool Story
I was looking through my notes on my Blackberry the other day and realized that I had never shared this cool story with you. I met a pastor in Soroti that has been taking some classes that my friend has been teaching. I think he held the title of bishop of one of the churches. I'm not sure what that really means, but he was an older gentleman who had lived as a Christian during Idi Amin's time.
He shared several stories with us, but my favorite was the one in which he was pastoring a church and the army soldiers at the time were ordered to arrest all the Christians. So they soldiers came into the church and arrested everyone there. Fortunately for this pastor, he was not at the church at the time. He was spared this arrest, or was he?
When he found out that the whole church had been arrested by the army, he gave instructions to his wife to return to the village for her own protection. Then he went to where the congregation was being held and gave himself up to the army. He told them that he was among those group of Christians that they arrested. One of the soldiers told his leader that he too was a Christian and didn't agree with the order to arrest Christians. He refused to be the one to arrest this pastor. In the end, the army officer released the whole church. What an amazing testimony!
I just thought to myself, "Would I do that? Would I turn myself in to be arrested like he did?" I'm not sure I would, but the faith of the people here in Uganda often amazes me. I wish I had their faith...actually I'm working on that. Every day I pray for more faith so I can fulfill the promises that God has to use me wherever I am to preach the word, to heal, to cast out demons or whatever God wants to do through me.
He shared several stories with us, but my favorite was the one in which he was pastoring a church and the army soldiers at the time were ordered to arrest all the Christians. So they soldiers came into the church and arrested everyone there. Fortunately for this pastor, he was not at the church at the time. He was spared this arrest, or was he?
When he found out that the whole church had been arrested by the army, he gave instructions to his wife to return to the village for her own protection. Then he went to where the congregation was being held and gave himself up to the army. He told them that he was among those group of Christians that they arrested. One of the soldiers told his leader that he too was a Christian and didn't agree with the order to arrest Christians. He refused to be the one to arrest this pastor. In the end, the army officer released the whole church. What an amazing testimony!
I just thought to myself, "Would I do that? Would I turn myself in to be arrested like he did?" I'm not sure I would, but the faith of the people here in Uganda often amazes me. I wish I had their faith...actually I'm working on that. Every day I pray for more faith so I can fulfill the promises that God has to use me wherever I am to preach the word, to heal, to cast out demons or whatever God wants to do through me.
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